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VISIONS OF MY PAST

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Between dealing with sexual abuse, alcohol, toxic relationships, and drama, I would often wonder whatever happened to my happily ever after? I guess this is what growing up in a dysfunctional family where sexual abuse and even rape were both part of my everyday life. Somehow, this cycle would continue as I entered into my teens and became a 15-year-old mother. I thought being beaten and pregnant by the father of my child had taken everything out of me, but that sadly changed when the death of my baby boy took what little spirit of hope I had left. The encouragement of getting out of this nightmare suddenly settled within me, but it would forever leave me with the need to fill a void. His name was Elijah Romeno. He was much older and very married. I thought he loved me, but the mind of a child is so gullible. His love instantly turned into rage and at this point, I was finally convinced that my birth was no more than a curse. Turning to drugs, sex, and alcohol as a means to escape the hell I had seemingly created for myself, I would continue to go left instead of right. As I sit and glance out the window I wonder will I ever get my happily ever after or should I let go of this false hope as the visions of my past continue to haunt my memory.

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